Wednesday, February 02, 2005

Getting to Know Greg

Sometimes Artistic Director Greg sends me (and others) random emails, not particularly for the blog, but things he finds funny. I thought I'd share two such emails today. This should give you insight into Greg's fertile mind.

First he sent me a site where you can translate anything into Valley Girl language. (Or Swedish Chef, or Buckwheat, for that matter.) I mean, like seriously, isn't the Valley Girl thingie, like, dude, two decades passe?

But anyway, he took one of my blog posts and had it translated and emailed it to me. Very funny, Greg. No, really! Oh My Gawd!

Try it for yourself.

The yesterday he sent me this gem:
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The ANNUAL NEOLOGISM CONTEST

Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words.


And the winners are:

1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.

2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.

3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.

6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.

7. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

8. Gargoyle (n.), olive-flavored mouthwash.

9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.

10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.

11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.

12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.

13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.

14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.

15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), The belief that, when you die, your Soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.

===========================================

What does this tell you about Greg?

He likes language. playing with it, manipulating it. Is it any wonder he's the script-king?

There you go, a little analysis free of charge.

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